Two women friends went out without their husbands for a Girls Night Out. As they were walking home, both of them incredibly drunk, they suddenly realized they both needed to pee. They were near a graveyard and one of them suggested they do their business behind a headstone.
They realized they didn't have anything to wipe with. One of the women took off her panties, used them and discarded them. Her friend, however, was wearing a pair of expensive underwear and didn't want to ruin them, but she was lucky enough to salvage a large ribbon from a wreath that was on a grave and proceeded to wipe herself with it. After finishing, they made their way home.
The next day the first woman's husband phones the other husband and says, "These damn girls nights out have got to stop. My wife came home last night without her panties."
"That's nothing," said the other. "Mine came back with a card stuck between the cheeks of her butt that said, From all of us at the Fire Station, we'll never forget you!"